A Simple Guide to Star Trek

In anticipation of the influx of teeny-(and tweeny)-boppers that will be enamored will the new "sexy" Star Trek, I have decided to make a guide to Star Trek in terms they will understand.

• The Starship Enterprise - Like the Black Pearl only in Space.
• Space - where the moon lives.
• Humans - What you are.
• Vulcans - Aliens from space (Juanito the gardener is not from space).
  
• Vulcan and Human Relations - kinda like... how Paris and Nicole Richie say they are friends, but really don't get along, but they know they are better off pretending they do.
  
• James Tiberius Kirk - TroyBolton/Zac Efron
• Starfleet - kinda like the airforce...
• Phasers - a hair dryer that can kill people.
• Transporter - ...
• Warp Speed - driving over the speed limit ....of the universe.
• Deflector Shields - a condom for the space ship

Ok so that should get you up to speed. If you need anything else let me know and I'll be sure to answer it in terms you can understand.

-Engage